momma and daddy have been gone a very long time. i'm sure newman did something to make them leave. he's so annoying with his constant "please love me" routine. i do love to smell his butt, but not when i'm trying to snooze.
last week before momma deserted us, lindy and i knocked her down while we were in our field playing. yep; knocked momma right on her fat ass. it was SO FUNNY! we really didn't mean to though. we were just having a smack down and lost track of space. really, momma was in the way. but maybe that's why she left us here alone and hungry and starved for affection.
there ARE good things when mom and dad are gone; the house smells absolutely perfect now and we've been sleeping on the furniture so the couch smells like my butt. plus the substitute teacher/sitter (ann) is totally clueless. she hasn't become immune to the "i need pizza and steak" sad, soulful eye routine yet. lindy and i have perfected the moves on her. we have her wrapped around our dew claws. lindy figured out how to turn on the tv too which is kind of irritating cause she can't always find the channel she likes and we'll get stuck on cnn for too long or she WILL find animal planet then bark constantly. we saw previews for a movie called 'hotel for dogs' though; i really want to see it. momma never takes us to a hotel. she says we're not meant for public consumption, whatever that means.
gotta go; ann is here and i have to put my starving dog face on.
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